Great times yesterday! It was only me and Sara in our group, ’cause Anita was too tired or something, and Jill was going to ride Odalia, but she had a limp, so then it was only two… =) We had the best horses and our wonderful instructor Ingela all to ourselves. Ofcourse I was sorry for the other two, but getting all that attention isn’t bad!

Well actually, if you ask my body today, it is. My butt hurts, because we spent a long while riding without those things you put your feet into (stigbyglar). Very good thing to do if you want to look good on a horse. Very bad thing to do if you don’t want a butt that hurts… =)

And then we had a long talk afterwards. I’m not sure Ingela understood what we wanted to say, because I don’t think we even understood it ourselves. But I’ve come to realize that what I’ve been really missing is communication. We haven’t been involved in the process of planning our lessons, and that’s… Well I have never been before, but somehow it feels like I should be now.

And it feels like maybe Anita and Jill isn’t in it for the same reasons I am. Whenever there is talk of riding to Storknabben, they are always for it, it seems to me. But I’d rather ride around in the paddock.

So what reasons AM i in it for? I think I have an idea now, and I want to write it down before it dissapears.

I want to learn things. I want to get better. Not to compete. Not this year. Maybe not for many years to come, but I don’t want to close that door. MAYBE I would want to compete in a distant future! And if that day comes I don’t want to feel I’ve wasted any time. It just doesn’t feel right for me whenever the topic of competing comes up and it ends in “this group is NOT going to compete, but…”. But that’s all just words, right?

The thing about it all is if I will want to compete, it is not jumping I want to be doing… It’s the other thing. What is the word? Dressage?

There is no greater joy than to feel the horse dancing around the arena, obeying, when you know that if you let the horse, it is going to try it’s little tricks… =)

By the way, Talar and I get along great together. I hope I get the chance to get to know him for a long time to come. I’ve had some misfortune with my favourite ridingschool horses in the past, so I hope this is the one that will work out!

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